As most of you know I had to have 2 brain sugeries back in 2004. Well, my mom called me last night to say that Extreme Makeover Home Edition this past week was for a family that has endured this "disease." I quote that b/c I literally had no idea it was so serious and took it very lightly, or else the Holy Spirit literally lessoned my burden drastically.
There are some links below. The second link is the Extreme video link so that you can watch it for yourself. The others are information about Chiari Malformation (the 2nd surgery I had). I also found out that hydrocephalis (my first surgery) is perhaps caused by the Chiari disease. I was under the impression that the cyst I had caused the hydrocephalus, but now I wonder. It is a really neat story and I can't help but be grateful to God for the timing and the miracle of the entire situation.
http://www.postchronicle.com/news/science/article_212110401.shtml
http://video.aol.com/video-detail/extreme-makeover-home-edition-the-carter-family/1613811329
http://www.chiaripeople.org/events.php
http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/chiari/chiari.htm
http://www.neurosurgerytoday.org/what/patient_e/chiari1.asp
In addition to this, I was just graciously given two hockey tickets for Halloween night, for FREE. All I have to do is pay for parking and I get another person in. If anyone would like to go, let me know. It's at 7:30 next Wednesday!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Where am I in life right this minute? This might be long as I have just finished a large cappuccino from QT.
As for a current, yet short, update on my life as of right now, here it goes. New Years Day of 2007 I woke up around 5 AM finally saying yes to the thought of being a teacher. I had run from it for far too long, mainly out of fear. Then I realized that I was running from it and started pursuing it. I started substitute teaching, applied for my alternative certification, attended two job fairs, applied for jobs, interviewed, and then actually received a job offer. I am now a Special Education teacher for Keller ISD for a school that is actually located in Fort Worth, TX. I live with a friend that I have known since my Freshman year of college. We didn't keep up all too well but were talking in the Spring about life and substitute teaching. Who knew we would end up living together and that we would do so well being roommates? She is a blessing to have in my life right now seeing that I don't really have any friends out this way (Fort Worth).
As far as work goes, I love my job. I love my students and find myself thinking of them constantly. It is sooooo hard though. It is something I am having to constantly rely on the Lord because it is probably the most difficult thing I have ever done. I can't even get a day ahead in planning and have never even submitted one lesson plan, and we are 7 weeks in to the school year. It's an amazing opportunity and I am so thankful for it, despite how hard it is. It is something I will look back on and praise God for bringing me through and maturing me. It is something I hope I will never forget. I don't have a team at work because I'm Special Education and all of us do our own thing. Plus, Life Skills (my class) is the only one on our campus and it's new to campus, so I don't have anyone at my school to get ideas from, etc. It's hard, but I hear that it will get easier as the years go by. We'll see. I hope to do this for awhile, at least be at my school for awhile. I love it so much and know God has me there for a reason. In my job search I kept hearing, "you have to know people to get a job," well I didn't know anyone. God opened the door wide open and I walked through it.
Grad School: If you have 10 burners on a stove, I feel like this is the furthest back burner. It's been hard to focus on grad school with everything else on my plate. This year is all about survival and so grad school gets neglected. I do my work, but my heart is not in it this year. I am practically getting paid to attend school this year and it's probably the only and last time that will happen now that I am making a salary, so I needed to do it. I'm currently deciding what I should do about next semester as far as continuing or taking a break. I need to decide fast as registration is probably right around the corner. In case you don't know my major is Community Counseling. As I think about being a Counselor though I wonder b/c the people that I want to reach out too can't afford counseling and have problems to deep for a counselor to help. For instance myself, I have been to three different counselors and still find myself absolutely in so much pain over the same issues still undealt with. So I don't know, we'll see.
As far as everything else goes: I'm still trying to find a church out here and still can't bring myself to email the Village to say that I no longer go there. It's too far to drive but I'm afraid to say I have stopped or to not call it my home, b/c I don't have a home to replace it with. I don't have a family and need one so badly. I don't feel like the same joyful/optimistic person I used to be and I think part of that is not being surrounded by a body of believers. I have believers, dear friends, that I still talk to but phone conversations and a godly roommate are not nearly the same as what is commanded by Him. I have prayed and prayed and nothing seems to be happening. I attended a church two Sundays ago that I finally felt that I liked and some guy hit on me and made me feel incredibally uncomfortable, and now I don't want to go back there. My spiritual life is not what it used to be, but I still learn some in little doses about God and it's strange b/c I am hit by the simple truths that I have known for years, but still have to be reminded of as I sit here alone. I have to keep telling myself that God will not abandon me, even when I feel abandoned. And I have to tell myself to not be discouraged and to be strong b/c God tells me not to be in Joshua 1. I feel my faith is weak compared to the past, but how do I know if that is a lie or reality, not sure, and trying to find out. I think it's reality b/c it's hard to pray whole heartedly like I used to. Most of my prayers these days are me crying out humbly asking for help, rather than praying every second like in the past.
I know this is a lot for a first days post but it is an update to those of you who have asked and I have been short with or not known how to express. I needed to get this out in writing so that I can reflect back on a time when I didn't feel or see God's presence, but it was there the entire time.
I apologize for the length and depth of this post, but I should not have to apologize for the depth, isn't that what sisters and brothers in Christ are for?
Peace.
As far as work goes, I love my job. I love my students and find myself thinking of them constantly. It is sooooo hard though. It is something I am having to constantly rely on the Lord because it is probably the most difficult thing I have ever done. I can't even get a day ahead in planning and have never even submitted one lesson plan, and we are 7 weeks in to the school year. It's an amazing opportunity and I am so thankful for it, despite how hard it is. It is something I will look back on and praise God for bringing me through and maturing me. It is something I hope I will never forget. I don't have a team at work because I'm Special Education and all of us do our own thing. Plus, Life Skills (my class) is the only one on our campus and it's new to campus, so I don't have anyone at my school to get ideas from, etc. It's hard, but I hear that it will get easier as the years go by. We'll see. I hope to do this for awhile, at least be at my school for awhile. I love it so much and know God has me there for a reason. In my job search I kept hearing, "you have to know people to get a job," well I didn't know anyone. God opened the door wide open and I walked through it.
Grad School: If you have 10 burners on a stove, I feel like this is the furthest back burner. It's been hard to focus on grad school with everything else on my plate. This year is all about survival and so grad school gets neglected. I do my work, but my heart is not in it this year. I am practically getting paid to attend school this year and it's probably the only and last time that will happen now that I am making a salary, so I needed to do it. I'm currently deciding what I should do about next semester as far as continuing or taking a break. I need to decide fast as registration is probably right around the corner. In case you don't know my major is Community Counseling. As I think about being a Counselor though I wonder b/c the people that I want to reach out too can't afford counseling and have problems to deep for a counselor to help. For instance myself, I have been to three different counselors and still find myself absolutely in so much pain over the same issues still undealt with. So I don't know, we'll see.
As far as everything else goes: I'm still trying to find a church out here and still can't bring myself to email the Village to say that I no longer go there. It's too far to drive but I'm afraid to say I have stopped or to not call it my home, b/c I don't have a home to replace it with. I don't have a family and need one so badly. I don't feel like the same joyful/optimistic person I used to be and I think part of that is not being surrounded by a body of believers. I have believers, dear friends, that I still talk to but phone conversations and a godly roommate are not nearly the same as what is commanded by Him. I have prayed and prayed and nothing seems to be happening. I attended a church two Sundays ago that I finally felt that I liked and some guy hit on me and made me feel incredibally uncomfortable, and now I don't want to go back there. My spiritual life is not what it used to be, but I still learn some in little doses about God and it's strange b/c I am hit by the simple truths that I have known for years, but still have to be reminded of as I sit here alone. I have to keep telling myself that God will not abandon me, even when I feel abandoned. And I have to tell myself to not be discouraged and to be strong b/c God tells me not to be in Joshua 1. I feel my faith is weak compared to the past, but how do I know if that is a lie or reality, not sure, and trying to find out. I think it's reality b/c it's hard to pray whole heartedly like I used to. Most of my prayers these days are me crying out humbly asking for help, rather than praying every second like in the past.
I know this is a lot for a first days post but it is an update to those of you who have asked and I have been short with or not known how to express. I needed to get this out in writing so that I can reflect back on a time when I didn't feel or see God's presence, but it was there the entire time.
I apologize for the length and depth of this post, but I should not have to apologize for the depth, isn't that what sisters and brothers in Christ are for?
Peace.
Like I really needed this...
Hello everyone!
As if I didn't spend enough time procrastinating online, facebook, xanga, etc., I decided to add yet another website to get addicted to. I spend enough time reading people's blogspots so I finally caved and got my own so that I can be more efficient as I read blogs of those people I love and admire. I will use this to share prayer requests, praises to my Heavenly Father, and updates on this life that I am learning how to live minute by minute.
Please join me on this journey of life as you read my blog and pray with me on a regular basis.
Thank you in advance!
As if I didn't spend enough time procrastinating online, facebook, xanga, etc., I decided to add yet another website to get addicted to. I spend enough time reading people's blogspots so I finally caved and got my own so that I can be more efficient as I read blogs of those people I love and admire. I will use this to share prayer requests, praises to my Heavenly Father, and updates on this life that I am learning how to live minute by minute.
Please join me on this journey of life as you read my blog and pray with me on a regular basis.
Thank you in advance!
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